Need to Scream

So i have been keeping this in for a while and things have just been building up so i just need to let them out, things might not be in order or make much sense though i just need to vent

the past 3 weeks have gone so fast, plus have also felt like a nightmare, between having Jade, moving house and just the general stuff, i am completely exhausted, I haven't had time for anything or any one, the boys have suffered big time and it breaks my heart :(

Im up at the hospital every day, from any where from 3 hours to 9 hours a day, sitting beside my little girl, plus doing her cares, feeding her and just letting her know that i am there, and talking with doctors to find out the plan of attack etc, I know it is a mothers job though it is very tiring to be honest and very draining,

I have been trying my hardest with the boys, though they have suffered as i have just been so tired, and so busy they haven't gotten as much attention as they have liked or i have liked though i do try to spend a bit of time with them, though its pretty hard to when i am at the hospital all the time or i am home trying to clean up or cook, or look after 3 adults, and 2 kids plus myself

I still haven't unpacked the whole house yet, our garage is still packed full of boxes, and there is stuff that we need in them though i just don't have the energy to unpack them, let alone know where things are going to go,

I feel like i am the maid around this house, As i seem to be the one who does the cleaning, Washing, Cooking, etc, i know the other do help out, though probably not as much as i would like, i guess its just the small stuff, like after i cook it would be nice if someone else packed the dishwasher, and put it on, or someone else decided to do the washing for me, i don't know i guess i am just complaining about nothing there, though i just feel like everyone's maid

Daniel is out of the house more than what he is in it, between work and him going out to have a life, is starting to get really annoying, as he is basically never home and the kids hardly get a chance to see him, so then again it makes it harder on me, like last night he went out for a "boys night" he went to the movies and the pub with his best mate, like dont get me wrong i dont mind him spending time with his best mate, as they have been friends ever since they were young, and he is going through relationship problems so Daniel is there to help, though it would be nice if Daniel offered to take me out for a change or spend some time with me, though no its ok he can go out have a life and leave the kids with me know all to well just how tired that i am, I would love to be able to go out and just have some time to myself with some friends, though between Being up at the hospital for jade (as no one else will sit p there with her), looking after the kids (when they are not in daycare), cleaning the house, and cooking oh and expressing, there is just not enough hours in the day,

My day starts at 4.30 every morning if not earlier, and doesn't end until 10.30pm if not later, I know i am just bitching about mother hood and its just a part of life though i really need to get this out, and it is stressing me out and i am at the point that i am about to scream,

On another note, i really don't know why Daniel is giving relationship advice, maybe he should take some of his own, though his own marriage is on the rocks, so maybe he should try and fix that first before trying to fix someone elses,

Maybe its just my hormones, maybe its just because i am so tired, though everything is just eating up at me and i just needed to vent, sorry for such the long post though just needed to get it out

though i guess Such Is Life, hey

Sick,

Well yet again the kids are sick AGAIN!!!!!!

They only ever seem to be well for abut a week then are sick again....

The doctor came out Thursday night to check Deacan out listened to his chest looked in his ears and took his temp and said that he was ok, that his chest was clear, and to keep an eye on him for 24 to 48 hours,
So Friday came sent him to daycare
they gave me a call, to say they were really worried about him, Picked him up he was coughing full on, nose running same with eyes and they were red as well, called doctors again, he came out looked over Deacan again said his chest was still clear though he has an upper respiratory infection and put him on antibiotics, Saturday he was still the same nose is getting better though cough is getting worse, then today (Sunday) he is still the same, coughing less though when he coughs he coughs for longer!!!!!! and now he has the runs!!!! just to add something else in there with the mix

Called 13HEALTH and the lady said to get him into the Doctor  tomorrow morning, as his antibiotics may be to strong for him!!! though listening to him tonight i can see it will be a hospital night as the cough is one o the nastiest cough i have ever heard him have....

So thats all deacan


Jason isn't to bad, he has the normal teething stuff, plus now eczema his isn't to bad, just have to put steroid cream on him twice a day for 2 weeks


And to top it all off, yet again my throat is all swollen and i eel i am coming down with a head cold, I am so sick of all this illness, i guess winter isn't around for much longer so guess the kids wont be sick for much longer

Boys First day

the boys first day at their new daycare was great,

to start with Jason only stayed with me for 5 mins then left to go and play though deacan wasn't to sure about the center,

though called them around 1pm to see how their days were going
and deacan and Jason both ate morning tea (fruit) Jason went back for seconds WTF!!! he never eats fruit for me!!!!

And lunch was fish fingers with pasta and veg and tomato sauce and BOTH of them ate it, and Jason went back for seconds again!!!!! he has NEVER ate meat or veg for me!!!!!!

they both slept well at daycare, Jason had a sleep and wake up crying as he didnt know where he was though as soon as the carer sat with him he was fine

And to top it off i asked jason when we were leaving do you want to come back tomorrow and he was like ya ya ya (his way of saying yes )

Mornings

Every morning in this house hold is such a pain in the butt, and very busy between getting Daniel up for work and the kids ready for daycare, then trying to clean up dishes bottles etc, its full on,

I get up most mornings between 4.30am and 5am, then need to get Daniel up at 5.30am then the boys wake up any where from 6am onwards we leave here between 7 and 8am, to get them to daycare....

I really hate mornings